Inappropriate Things I Didn’t Notice in Movies as a Kid
I want to give a shout-out to the makers of children’s movies. Thanks for throwing in some off-color double-entredes and sometimes downright dirty jokes in there for the grown-ups. And now that I notice/understand some of them, I want to give a shout-out to my parents for letting me watch that smut.
1. The “climax” scene of Dumbo. I watched this movie obsessively as a child and I’m 99% sure I thought it was funny at one point to whisper in sleeping peoples’ ears, “climax! climax! get to your climax!”. How am I not a sex offender?
2. Michael Jordan’s “performance issues” joke in Space Jam.
3. Mt. Wannahockaloogie in Finding Nemo. Not inappropriate, but it definitely went over my head the first time I saw it. Classic.
4. When the condom breaks in Grease (“It broke. . . . I’ve had it since the 7th grade”).
5. — Rizzo: “What’s up Kenicky?”
— Kenicky: “One guess”. (Grease)
6. — Danny: “Bite the weenie, Riz”.
— Rizzo: “With relish”. (Grease)
7. On the car in Grease: “The chicks’ll cream / it’s a real pussy wagon / she’ll have to put out before she even gets in”, etc. etc. etc.
7. Basically the entire screenplay of Grease.
8. When Alfalfa wakes up “soaking wet” after dreaming of Darla in Little Rascals.