Words of Wisdom

by sassandbite

“The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on — it is never of any use to oneself.” –Oscar Wilde

1. There is nothing worse than a party pooper.

2. Make to-do lists with little check boxes. Even better, follow it up by actually doing the stuff, and then put little checks in the check boxes. It’s very satisfying. You can even cheat by putting things like “wash hair” and “make to-do list” on there so you can look at it and feel accomplished at the end of the day.

3. Resist the urge to step on the scale. Numbers are virtually meaningless — and scales are liars.

4. Look on the bright side!

5. Just because you put your blinker on at the last second doesn’t give you the right to cut me off and nearly send me crashing to my death in a fiery blaze, asshole.

6. Can we all just agree to stop calling bologna “food”?

7. Going to Costco for the sole purpose of eating all the samples, and counting this as a meal, is not only acceptable, but encouraged.

8. Wear your pretty / expensive things regularly. I know you’re saving it for a special occasion. But you can make any day a special occasion. Why deprive yourself — and the world — of the sight of that fabulous Chanel bag or the smell of that gorgeous and unmistakable perfume? It’s a disservice to us all. Also, you could die tomorrow.