America the Aggravating

by sassandbite

Because I am a singularly gifted judge of character with a unparalleled sense of human nature, I predicted that everyone would be freaking out about The Coke Commercial, and the reaction to The Coke Commercial. And every radio station and TV station and website is reading tweets and interviewing people, and it’s what always happens and it needs to stop.

Half of them are ignorant xenophobic jackasses and the other half are inflammatory, attention-seeking jackasses. Either way, for fuck’s sake let’s just stop indulging them.

I have only four things to say on the subject:

— “America the Beautiful” is not the national anthem.

— In case that doesn’t speak for itself: you don’t get to tell me shit about people not speaking english in America if your own tenuous grasp of spelling, grammar, and syntax is eighth-grade level at best.

— People who post these things should be required to staple a copy of it to every job or loan application they ever fill out for the rest of their lives.

— If things like “diversity” and “humanity” and “basic common sense and the most fundamental understanding of American history” aren’t your thing, by all means continue your family’s tradition of marrying your cousins. Its clearly working out well for you. Just don’t subject the rest of us to your nonsense.

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