Sass & Bite

"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you" Oscar Wilde

Category: Capturing My Fancy

Mondays are Hard.

Let me help you procrastinate.

What Planet are You On?

Furthering my belief that Londoners do everything better, Coco’s Tea Party has informed me that Anya Hindmarch has a new exhibit at her Mayfair store featuring personalized horoscope/zodiac info and also candy. You input your name and birthdate into the machine and it spits out a scroll with a bunch of cool facts about you and your date, and also a lollipop. These happen to be two of my favorite things.

Just as I was starting to pout because I couldn’t participate, ta-da!, I discovered you can do it online. And it’s really cool. It has your typical astrological this-is-what-you’re-like tidbits, and also things like your signs under different zodiacs, the top song on the day you were born (I clearly get my affection for sequins and leather from Cher), your age broken down into every possible numeration (I’m just over 726 million seconds old, as it turns out), and even unsolicited information about the date you were likely conceived. I’m on to you, mom and dad.

Also, it confirmed by belief that I should just be a world leader. So, you know, I’m on board.

Here’s the link, check it out:

http://www.whatplanetareyouon.com

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Earn Your Stripes

 
I’ve been somewhat fixated on stripes lately. Particularly striped shirts. Stripes are great no?

So simple, so chic, so bold. French girls know this to be true.

And contrary to everything my mother ever told me, I’m partial to horizontal stripes. They won’t make you look fat.

Pinky promise.

Gimme

Gimme

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Emmanuelle Alt

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Gary Pepper

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Sofia Coppola

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Marion Cotillard

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Prada A/W 2013

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Lou Doillon

Just Showing off My Future Husband

While in the midst of a YouTube wormhole, I was lured to this video by the promise of two of my favorite things: fancy grilled cheeses and Seth Myers.

Picture 1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsiiZC9DIbY

I’ve been trying to keep this on the DL, but Seth and I will be tying the knot and making babies with enchanting dimples and a wicked sense of humor. . . sometime in the near future. As soon as he breaks up with his totally unattractive and contributing-nothing-to-society human rights lawyer “fiancé”. God, she is such dead weight.

For the record though, even with my infamous bitch face, I still smile more than her. I mean, how can you be that monotone with that standing in front of you making witty comments?

Anyway. Check it out, he’s totally charming and good-looking and funny, as per usual. And that sandwich looks bomb. Even though technically his girlfriend’s brother made it, but whatever.

I can cook for both of us, Seth. You just stand there and look pretty.

It’s October 3rd

It’s October 3rd.

Also known as Tina Fey Day (by me). In honor of this glorious day, and in one of my other favorite things ever, here are some Mean Girls / Harry Potter memes for the lolz. Enjoy!

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You can find more here.

Hair Bling

Lately I’ve grown bored with the same hair-down look, luscious though my locks are. Let’s examine some pretty, (mostly) simple ways of dressing it up. Just a lil pizzaz.

Pizzaz is such a great word, no?

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Pretty and unexpected

Bling Bun.

Bling Bun.

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Oh you fancy, huh?

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Bow crazy

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Messy ponytail + studs + oxblood leather = my jam

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And just for fun, if you’re really brave:

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Fashion Week (Month)

London Fashion Week kicks off tomorrow, New York has been this week, we haven’t even gotten to Paris yet. It’s fashionable all around. In honor of Fashion Week that’s really Fashion Month, and out of laziness, I’ve collected some photos. Some are from seasons past, some are from the most recent shows. Just lots of pretty pictures.

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Michael Kors S/S 2014

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Leigh Lezark a few years ago. Makes me realize how badly I need red feathers in my wardrobe.

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Fall 2013

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Photo by Stefano Coletti. That white dress is quite a statement.

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Oscar de la Renta Spring 2014 — I’m loving these colors

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The incomparable Carine Roitfeld leaving a show

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French Voguettes led by Emannuelle Alt

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Altuzarra making bold moves for Spring 2014

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Vivienne Westwood Spring 2012. Gorgeous.

Making Me Laugh

. . . is this random photograph of Leo Dicaprio:

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Hahahahahaha WHAT?

What is this?
Why is he sitting in a wind-blown field of grass?
Why is he wearing a turtleneck?
Was it fashionable at the time, or is to protect his delicate skin from the swan draped gently around his neck?
Where did he get this swan?
Why does he have it?

So many questions. I laugh hysterically every time I look at it.

Happy Monday and Happy Labor Day!

Pretty Things I Want, Nay, NEED.

. . . But probably can’t have because I should be exercising some restraint. Maybe.

I’ve been obsessed with finding a solid gold-plate belt for the last few months. I think it started with an episode of Game of Thrones in which Circe wore one and I was like, wow, that would be sensational. In real life. On me.

ASOS Belt

ASOS Plate Detail Elastic Waist Belt [$24]

This is the right idea, but ideally I’d like gold all the way around.

ASOS Double Plate and Spike Detail

ASOS Double Plate and Spike Detail [$12]

This is not what I went looking for, but it’s amazing anyway and I want it. To quote that sensational film, The Devil Wears Prada, when choosing between two belts, “it’s a tough call. They’re both so different. . . ”
I think that means I need both.

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Meh. Cool in it’s own way, but I feel like the loops are an invitation for people to hang on to you. Not in the fun way.

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Chictopia Gold Mirror Wide Plate Belt [$38]

Now THIS looks promising. I might have to do it.

From my Pinterest, in case you need a visual:

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*All images link back to the original site or image

Happy Friday!

To quote the songbird of our generation, Rebecca Black, it’s Friiiiday, Friday.  I have a busy weekend planned, and I don’t know yet what I’ll be doing tonight but I insist that it be outrageous and fun. So I looked at pretty pictures over my morning coffee to inspire.
It’s Friday — treat yo’self!

Brigitte Bardot being casual-fabulous

Brigitte Bardot being casual-fabulous

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Little Dresses

PHOTO © PETER STIGTER  FILENAME IS DESIGNER NAME  WOMANSWEAR FALL/WINTER 2010

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Grace Kelly on a late-night swim

Grace Kelly on a late-night swim

White Peach Sangria

White Peach Sangria

Brigitte again, as it should be

Brigitte again, as it should be

P.S. Sorry I’ve been slackin’ — busy week and lack of sleep. I’ll be better next week, pinky promise.

Interesting Householdy Things

I spend a lot of time mentally decorating my imaginary house. From my parents’ couch. Where I live.

It helps keep me sane.

Froissé Mirror by Mathius Kiss

Froissé Mirror by Mathius Kiss

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Jazzin’ up the stairs

Sofia Coppola's inspiration board. I'm pretty sure.

Sofia Coppola’s inspiration board. I’m pretty sure. Why is she so cool?

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P.S. I tried to link back to the sources, but I don’t have any for a few of them. If they’re yours and you find this, don’t sue me.

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