Sass & Bite

"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you" Oscar Wilde

Category: Things I Want and Would Wear

My Thoughts on the Oscars: A Running Commentary, Fueled Largely by Envy, Daydreams, and Red Wine

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1. I hate to be predictable, but Jennifer Lawrence nailed it, at least from the neck up. Her hair was sensational and I wish I could pull it off. The dress was not my favorite because I’m not a fan of peplums, but it wasn’t terrible.

2. Just when I was thinking Jonah Hill was doing a good job of keeping the douche under control, he went and name-dropped “Marty” and “Leo” like 4 times in 30 seconds.

3. Oh hey, Jada. We all saw you hurriedly kick your leg out á la Jolie just as the interview with ABC started. NJ, no judgement, just saying we saw it. Pretty dress though.

4. Just as I was thinking that Tyson Beckford or whatever his name is is a terrible red-carpet network reporter, he went and proved it by calling her “Jessica Roberts”.

5. And then the only person he actually got excited over was Jessica Biel, whose right to be there was questionable at best.

6. When the camera panned back/out from Sally Hawkins, who was (understandably if uncomfortably) awkward in interviews, to follow Jessica Biel down the carpet at a distance. . . Sucky in general. Especially sucky because it was for Jessica Biel.

7. Kevin Spacey informs me that John Stamos was there. . . Um, why. Go hang out with Lady Gaga. Why do all of these people get to go and I don’t?!

8. Whoever did Kim Novak’s nose should lose his license.

9. Love Catherine Martin’s (Best Costume Design/wife of Baz Luhrmann) dress. The color, the Japanese print, the contrast with the beading — perfect amount of maximalism.

10. Pretty sure Amy Adams was texting while Tyler Perry was introducing that one segment.

11. Angelina Jolie excitedly jumping to get in that selfie = my new favorite thing. And people say she’s too serious. She was having so much fun.

12. I would just like to point out that almost all of the heroes in the Heroes segment were men, and of the 6 women included, half of them were clips from X-Men.

13. Was Whoopie wearing the Goodwill version of Julia’s Golden Globes dress?

14. I am loving this new trend of everyone bringing their moms.

Best Dressed: Catherine Martin, Amy Adams (but only because those earrings perfectly set off that dress. Without them, it would have been boring. And her hair was a disaster), Kerry Washington (even though her dress was more GG than AA, the overall look was sensational. Especially because she’s pregnant). Sandra Bullock and Penelope Cruz both had great draping, and I loved the color of Penelope’s as well.

I wasn’t overwhelmed by anyone’s dress this year, in a wow-you-fucking-nailed-it-I-would-sleep-with-Harvey-Weinstein-and-a-middle-aged-Hollywood-executive-of-his-choice-for-an-opportunity-to-wear-that-to-the-Oscars way that I have been before  (Gywneth Paltrow 2012 and Charlize Theron last year, for example, or Mila Kunis at the SAG Awards 2011, or Jessica Chastain 2012 / 2013). They’ll just have to do better next year, I guess.

Or let me go.

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Fashion Week (Month)

London Fashion Week kicks off tomorrow, New York has been this week, we haven’t even gotten to Paris yet. It’s fashionable all around. In honor of Fashion Week that’s really Fashion Month, and out of laziness, I’ve collected some photos. Some are from seasons past, some are from the most recent shows. Just lots of pretty pictures.

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Michael Kors S/S 2014

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Leigh Lezark a few years ago. Makes me realize how badly I need red feathers in my wardrobe.

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Fall 2013

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Photo by Stefano Coletti. That white dress is quite a statement.

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Oscar de la Renta Spring 2014 — I’m loving these colors

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The incomparable Carine Roitfeld leaving a show

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French Voguettes led by Emannuelle Alt

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Altuzarra making bold moves for Spring 2014

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Vivienne Westwood Spring 2012. Gorgeous.

Pretty Things I Want, Nay, NEED.

. . . But probably can’t have because I should be exercising some restraint. Maybe.

I’ve been obsessed with finding a solid gold-plate belt for the last few months. I think it started with an episode of Game of Thrones in which Circe wore one and I was like, wow, that would be sensational. In real life. On me.

ASOS Belt

ASOS Plate Detail Elastic Waist Belt [$24]

This is the right idea, but ideally I’d like gold all the way around.

ASOS Double Plate and Spike Detail

ASOS Double Plate and Spike Detail [$12]

This is not what I went looking for, but it’s amazing anyway and I want it. To quote that sensational film, The Devil Wears Prada, when choosing between two belts, “it’s a tough call. They’re both so different. . . ”
I think that means I need both.

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Meh. Cool in it’s own way, but I feel like the loops are an invitation for people to hang on to you. Not in the fun way.

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Chictopia Gold Mirror Wide Plate Belt [$38]

Now THIS looks promising. I might have to do it.

From my Pinterest, in case you need a visual:

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*All images link back to the original site or image

Interesting Householdy Things

I spend a lot of time mentally decorating my imaginary house. From my parents’ couch. Where I live.

It helps keep me sane.

Froissé Mirror by Mathius Kiss

Froissé Mirror by Mathius Kiss

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Jazzin’ up the stairs

Sofia Coppola's inspiration board. I'm pretty sure.

Sofia Coppola’s inspiration board. I’m pretty sure. Why is she so cool?

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P.S. I tried to link back to the sources, but I don’t have any for a few of them. If they’re yours and you find this, don’t sue me.

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